It’s Been A Sad Week! :(

As some of you may know, our dear Sister In Christ Fontella Nicole Davis passed away last Friday. I got the  news from my mom after I got off work. She told me it was all over facebook. I had actually signed out of my facebook account because I was helping a friend put pictures on his account. I usually check it on my lunch break (I know I’m obsessed and nosy) but because I had to sign all the way in I decided against it. I believe this was God protecting me through the rest of my day and allowing me to finish my shift. When I heard the news I went through a lot of emotions. Hurt, anger, disbelief, extreme sadness, wonder about my own mortality, and extreme loss. I met Fontella I believe in 2006. We met at a breast cancer conference in Houston. I kept calling her Fontana and she kept correcting me. Lol! Shonta was alive then. Shonta is another one of our sisters that was called to heaven too soon. She had breast cancer and she was doing very well for a while but then it came back with a vengeance. It eventually spread to her brain and she passed away. Fontella and I were diagnosed around the same time. I relapsed in 2008 and she relapsed a year later. I’m not going to lie I was jealous of her. Here I was going through chemotherapy and she was living her life cancer free. I resented my diagnosis and healthy survivors. Then she was rediagnosed and it was much worse than mine. It had already spread to her bones and some of her organs. She fought so hard. She fought till the very end. I called on one of my favorite people Sis. Joanne Rodgers for support and guidance. Whenever someone dies from breast cancer(and it seems like more and more people every day) I go to her. I call her and she talks me through the pain and confusion. What I lack in understanding she more than makes up in faith, love and comfort. She is a true blessing to me because she has been there. She understands the ups and downs. The ins and outs that someone who hasn’t experienced it doesn’t get. I have a wonderful support system. I am extremely blessed. Blessed beyond measure. Sometimes even I don’t understand how God’s goodness and mercy shines on me. Anyway, back to Sis. Rodgers, until you have lived it, gone through it, and fought for your life you will never understand. Sitting in the doctor’s office or wherever you are and hearing the words you never want to hear; cancer. Your blood runs cold and tears spring from your eyes. You are thinking about your own time line and all the things you have yet to do or experience. Having a friend who has had those exact emotions or very similiar makes you so grateful. I have a peace and a sense of calm that comes over me when I talk to her. She makes things okay. She tells me things I already know such as cancer is really a crap shoot (she doesn’t use those words………..she’s an ELDER’S WIFE!!!). You have to have a positive relationship with God and be ready. That is for anything. She always says we could walk off a curb and be hit by a bus and that is our way to go. Nothing to do with the cancer. The most important thing is to have God in your life. Fontella was so faithful. She is such an inspiration. She went to church every time the doors were open, unless she was feeling bad. She helped raise her nephews even though she was very sick from the chemotherapy. She never lost her faith in God and that is one of the most important things I have learned from her. She never blamed God for her illness or questioned his reasoning. Knowing Fontella was more than a blessing. It was divine intervention. She came into my life because everyone we knew with cancer was older and she was the only one near my age. Now, she was about 10 or 11 years older than me but that didn’t matter. She is amazing and I am so glad she is in no more pain or suffering. I was saddened to hear one of the reasons she moved back to Houston was because the doctor’s told her there was nothing they could do for her here in Dallas. They had given up on her but Fonz had not given up on herself. She went back to her howmetown and to one of the best cancer centers in America. She was given 2-2 1/2 more precious years of life. I didn’t talk to her as often once she left but we would catch up every month or month and a 1/2. The last time I spoke with her was via text message in February and the last time she heard my voice was when I sang her happy birthday in March. I miss her very much and there is a huge void in my life. The weird thing about life is it continues on. [OAN: I had chemo today and it went very well. My doctor is very happy and hopeful with my prognosis]. The most important lesson I have learned is to live every day as if it is your last. Always hug, kiss and love on the people in your life. Even strangers. You never know what just an acknowledgement will mean to someone. Also, love the Lord our God with all your heart. Never lean on your own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him and he will direct your path! God bless and much love! šŸ™‚

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3 thoughts on “It’s Been A Sad Week! :(

  1. I love you and I am so proud of your strength. I pray your heart becomes light in knowing your friend is among the angels, and they are forever with you!

  2. May God Bless You & Comfort You in the Loss of Your Dear Friend! To think that even now she is in the presence of God beholding the face of Jesus! Come Lord Jesus Come! Praise God for Sister Rodgers! May God give you strength & victory as you go through the battle with cancer.

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